TAX STRUCTURE IN INDIA

TAX STRUCTURE IN INDIA

1) What r u doing?
Ans. : Business
Tax :pAY PROFESSIONAL TAX!
2) What r u doing in Business?
Ans. : Selling the Goods.
Tax : PAY SALES TAX!!
3) From where r u getting Goods?
Ans. : From other State/Abroad
Tax : PAY CENTRAL SALES TAX, CUSTOM DUTY
& OCTROI!
4) What r u getting in Selling Goods?
Ans. : Profit
Tax : PAY INCOME TAX!
How do you distribute profit ?
Ans : By way of dividend
Tax : Pay dividend distribution Tax
5) Where u Manufacturing the Goods?
Ans. : Factory
Tax : PAY EXCISE DUTY!
6) Do u have Office / Warehouse/ Factory?
Ans. : Yes
Tax : PAY MUNICIPAL & FIRE TAX!
7) Do you have Staff?
Ans. : Yes
Tax : PAY STAFF PROFESSIONAL TAX!
8) Doing business in Millions?
Ans. : Yes
Tax : PAY TURNOVER TAX!
Ans : No
Tax : Then pay Minimum Alternate Tax
9) r u taking out over 25,000 Cash from Bank?
Ans. : Yes, for Salary.
Tax : PAY CASH HANDLING TAX!
10) Where r u taking your client for Lunch &
Dinner?
Ans. : Hotel
Tax : PAY FOOD & ENTERTAINMENT TAX!
11) r u going Out of Station for Business?
Ans. : Yes
Tax : PAY FRINGE BENEFIT TAX!
12) Hav u taken or given any Service/s?
Ans. : Yes
Tax : PAY SERVICE TAX!
13) How come u got such a Big Amount?
Ans. : Gift on birthday
Tax : PAY GIFT TAX!
14) Do u have any Wealth?
Ans. : Yes
Tax : PAY WEALTH TAX!
15) To reduce Tension, for entertainment,
where are you going?
Ans. : Cinema or Resort
Tax : PAY ENTERTAINMENT TAX!
16) Hav u purchased House?
Ans. : Yes
Tax : PAY STAMP DUTY & REGISTRATION FEE !
17) How u Travel?
Ans. : Bus
Tax : PAY SURCHARGE!
18) Any Additional Tax?
Ans. : Yes
Tax : PAY EDUCATIONAL, ADDITIONAL
EDUCATIONAL & SURCHARGE ON ALL THE
CENTRAL GOVT.'s TAX !!!
19) Delayed any time Paying Any Tax?
Ans. : Yes
Tax : PAY INTEREST & PENALTY!
20) INDIAN :: can i die now??
Ans :: wait we are about to launch the funeral
tax!!

HOW TO RECRUIT THE RIGHT PERSON FOR THE JOB!

HOW TO RECRUIT THE RIGHT PERSON FOR THE JOB!

Put about 100 bricks in some Particular order in
a closed Room with an Open window.
Then send 2 or 3 candidates into the room and
close the door.
Leave them alone and come back After 6 hours
and then analyse The situation..
If they are counting the
Bricks.
Put them in the Accounts Department.
If they are recounting them..
Put them in Auditing ..
If they have messed up the
Whole place with the bricks.
Put them in Engineering.
If they are arranging the
Bricks in some strange order.
Put them in Planning.
If they are throwing the
Bricks at each other.
Put them in Operations.
If they are sleeping.
Put them in Security.
If they have broken the bricks Into pieces.
Put them in Information Technology.
If they are sitting idle.
Put them in Human Resources.
If they say they have tried
Different combinations, yet
Not a brick has Been moved, put them in Sales.
If they have already left for
The day.
Put them in Marketing.
If they are staring out of the
Window.
Put them on Strategic Planning.
And then last but not least.
If they are talking to each
Other and not a single brick
Has been Moved.
Congratulate them and put them
in
Top Management..
Tx for reading..
Vinay shukla